I fear two things what my brain degeneration will look like - as in has my brain changed enough by the new nature to keep some of the fruits of the Spirit, or will that all just evaporate? I'm already exhibiting some of the dementia traits of agitation, swearing, and memory confusion (like when I get up and go to another room and then forget why). It's really a miracle that I can still write somewhat coherent essays. The second thing is the effect this will all have on my family. So, as I have said before, I am not scared of death, but I am very apprehensive about dying. The earliest signs were funny and Patty would laugh at the jokes I made about them... now, not so much. What's that sarcastic adage? "Life sucks and then you die." I know that isn't true with Born Again Believers, but it's close.