Sex-A Touchy Subject

D L Henderson
6 min readMay 5, 2021


Sex. Touchy subject (pun intended). Few phenomena have a greater impact on individuals and their societies. Never having had any classroom education on the subject, I am less than an authority, but what I have experienced in life seems to have some pragmatic validation which I will now explore…

Sex can twist the brain up in knots. It can twist the stomach up in knots. Even after a person “ties the knot,” it can mess with you. Beyond personal dilemmas, sexual dynamics can mess with not only the individual, but society as well. It will twist societies in ways perhaps detrimental to their eloquent and complex function.

Music. Now there is possibly not such a touchy subject. Yet, when I was growing up — in fact when my parents were growing up — music allowed boys and girls to be touchy in a civilized manner. They could wiggle and jiggle and move up from tag and hopscotch. We could even hold hands and get close in a polite way, overcoming fear of the opposite sex. Music gave us the slow dance. With me, the old “two step” remains as my “go to” with my wife.

Unfortunately, music can be just as much a twisting of the brain as sex. This is because all music is not edifying, morally or intellectually. Recently, I listened to a tune I had previously really liked. In other words it was aesthetically pleasing to me. But this time I heard the words, too. This particular “gentleman” was coming to town and “graciously” warning everyone to hide their daughters, sisters, and mothers, because he was intending to sexually assault them all. I concluded it was evil intent camouflaged by its rock and roll clothing. So, music, no matter the music’s appeal, can also work in detrimental ways on Society’s eloquent, complex function. How so? It is a “wrench in the gears” jamming the up social interaction with “trust issues” in any community of neighbors.

Well, anyone who knows me knows that I bring any discussions back to the Bible and the lifesaving principles I have discovered in its passages. From the very beginning God made boys and girls, and He expected them to grow up together and make more boys and girls. “Male and female He created them and said to them, ‘Be fruitful and multiply and fill up the earth.’ ” In the whole Creation visible with our eyes, male and female also “get busy” making more males and females. Even plants have male and female parts. This is the natural order of Life in the Natural world, written in the Laws of Nature, echoed perhaps one can say in the Law of Moses (There is where we’ve actually found the “Rhythm Method” of birth control!)

It is important here for me to interject this clarification between two similar words: natural and normal. Natural is derived from Nature. Normal is derived from what is commonly accepted within Society and its subcultures. (“natural — existing in or caused by nature; not made or caused by humankind.” normal — “conforming to a standard; usual, typical, or expected.”) My conclusion is that God’s whole purpose for boys and girls is making more boys and girls — Natures way. In fact, the only way that can happen is Nature’s way. My brother explained it to me this way: “normal” is the average behavior of individuals in a society like the average temperatures become the “normal” temperature for a particularday in meteorology.

What is becoming normal, however, in part, due to medical “advances” in plastic surgery, and perhaps in greater part, due to “advances” in the “intellectual” avantgarde, who some derisively call “the Elite,” who are promoting radical deviations from what is natural. By this, some groups in society are expanding what may be considered normal. Understand?

Of course, my question goes to the validity of this change — a change within a change in the LGBTQ community.

My approach to this hypersensitive topic is not from a position of superiority, because my Bible declares “all have sinned,” which means me too — from looking lustfully at women — whether photos, movies, or in person. “Spilling one’s seed on the ground,” happens with most boys. Oh. there are plenty of biblical references… there’s no point in going on. My point is that I am not being judgmental. There are people I have met that sexual considerations are simply not part of my trying to be friends. I really don’t care about that. I don’t care about your political, religious, social, or any personal persuasion. It is simply not part of my calculation. What I am admitting is that I just don’t understand the LGBTQ boys and girls, especially the transgender folks who think they must oppose their genetics and go to great lengths (and expense) to physically manipulate their bodies to appear to be something they are not.

Since the beginning of Mankind’s fall from the Garden, there has been a continuing spiral downwards. Even though there have been many high points in civilizations, it has always, always, always been a “mixed bag. ” If it could be analyzed on a graph, the trend line would be predominantly downward.

Most Bible scholars won’t agree with me on the following subject. In fact they will vehemently disagree and scornfully deride my conclusions, and I admit my translation of the passages in Romans 1 & 2 in light of Jesus saying, “For there are eunuchs who were born that way, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by others…” in Matthew 19:12 beginning with the word for “eunuchs” will cause some to dismiss all my points, this entire writing in toto. Oh well.

Nevertheless, let me continue… First, there are a whole bunch of sins that we will all be held accountable for, including sexual sins, of which as I have indicated , there are many. Remember. “sin” can be willful or ignorant or simply a falling short, a missing of the target.

While reading Romans, the passage from Matthew that says some eunuchs are born that way and some are made that way is parallel to some arguments used for accepting homosexuality was made clear to me. The passages which follow through Romans 1&2 list a whole variety of ensuing consequences which will bring God’s judgment in this life and the next. But they are not the result of homosexuality, but Paul says homosexuality is one of many consequences of sin and disobedience to God — the spiraling downward of people and societies that reject God… that reject Him in toto.

And here, I am quite stuck. For people born that way, what can one say? For those made that way by men, I think Society, in its callousness, might bully gentler souls into making bad choices. It may not be an excuse, but it is a possible reason, and it is a shared, sinful responsibility for oppressing one’s fellow man… What I really don’t get, however, are boys and girls born with the corresponding genitals can get their brains so twisted by sex that they go to such great lengths, and I’m guessing great expense, cut a part off or plug one up or add another couple parts… I apologize, but that is what I do not understand and cannot wrap my brain around.

I do not like ending an essay open ended and without a conclusion. So, as I said the Bible says that all have sinned and fallen short of the glory God has for us, but thankfully Jesus will forgive and repair and change us from the inside to restore us to the path toward that glory. It can be difficult to turn around, to turn away from our ways, to admit that we belong to the “all” in the phrase “all have sinned,” but you;ll never know unless you ask and seek and give Jesus a chance.

Finally, because there is no condemnation to them who are in Christ Jesus, and realizing I am still a work in progress, morally imperfect, and knowing that if I’m all about judging others, there is no room for me in the kingdom… I’ve had professors who I respect and who have challenged me intellectually to do something, anything, to improve society, and there may have been friends, never questioning their personal lives nor mine, Doctors, Nurses, ad infinitum, people like me “warts and all” who are trying the best they can to eke out a living, to try to do some good for others, and to try to find their place in the world… But this last thing… striving to find one’s place in the world… that endeavor has limited, temporary benefits, while striving to find a place with Jesus is perpetual and eternal.

“Then Jesus said, ‘Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.’” (Matthew 11:28, NLT)



D L Henderson

Born 1950; HS 1968; Born again 1972; Cornell ILR; Steward, Local President/Business Agent; Husband, father, grandfather; winner/loser/everything in between